"String too short to use"

10) Had a big fight with the Symphony a couple days ago. Could not get the throat plate back on correctly. The thread kept tangling and I was losing my temper big time. I finally put the whole thing back together, shut it off and walked away. I came back the next day. Turned it on. Everything works fine. When in doubt . . . reboot.

9) July, August and September are tightening our belts months. While it is true, my car is paid off, we have our annual auto insurance payment due the end of September. I have the money for it, but not for much of anything else. Popcorn and apple juice for dinner? Why yes, don’t mind if I do.

8) I am contemplating creating another clean spot this week. Now mind you, I don’t really want to, but this house doesn’t clean itself and maximum density has been reached. It is time to tackle another room. At the rate we’re going we will get through the house just in time to start over again. Just to make things interesting, this time around I adopted the policy from each room at least one thing must go. After all aren’t we all overwhelmed with stuff?

7) I am entering two of my quilt projects in the country fair this year. I haven’t entered anything in the county fair since I was a kid in 4H. I have a couple of completed items I am reasonably proud of. I don’t know if they are up to the judging standards, but we shall see. In any case it will be fun to have something on display. I also get to help clerk in the 4H hall during the judging phase. So I am looking forward to helping out as well as entering.

6) Just say no to sticky notes. When I worked at a bank one of the gals I worked with would literally cover the inside of her teller window with sticky notes, reminders, phone numbers account numbers, you name it. At the end of the day all of these had to be either locked in a drawer or shredded because of the private, sensitive nature of the information. Not to mention the fact that her window always looked trashy and unkempt. As I look at the cubby on my desk where my monitor sits, I see on the right hand side a rash of sticky notes. Grrr! They gotta go.

5) I spent the weekend painting the trim in our entryway. Do you know there are four doors that open into it? Now you do. That means four doors to take down (thank you CJE), and four jams to tape off and paint. It was loads of fun. So I taped off on Friday and managed to get two coats of paint on all of it Saturday with a small curious boy as backup. It is done, however, and brightens the look of the front of the house. Now on to the next room.

4) I saw this quote on facebook yesterday and it truly did make me laugh out loud.

"Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, make sure that you are, in fact, not just surrounded by assholes" ~William Gibson

You gotta admit, it is good advice.

3) With a nod to my mid-western readers: Our hot weather arrived yesterday. Not that I am rejoicing mind you, but normally our air conditioner is running hard the whole month of July. This year, yesterday was the first day I think we even broke into the 90°s. I must admit I have been loving the cool summer mornings. Still in the high 50°s at 7 a.m. is a whole lot nicer than 80°. Today it is 66°. Warmer, but still not bad.

2) I only have to work two days this week! I get to have sewing time today, Thursday and Friday. Yea! I have a dress to make for a six-month old girl (something I am actually getting paid for) and then several projects of my own to wrap up. Looking forward to time spent with my Symphony and being in my creative zone.

1) If you were to add a thirteenth month to the year, where would you insert it?

Welcome to my sanctuary

I (with CJE's help) spent several days last week deep cleaning my sewing room. Yes, I am one of those lucky people who has her own space for crafting and I love it. I call it my sanctuary. It is where I go whenever possible to create and commune with God.

This picture was taken from the doorway looking directly into the room.

This is the new sewing machine CJE & Liam got me for Mother's Day. Yes, I am spoiled. At this point I am convinced this machine is smarter than I am. When it comes to quilting, applique and basic sewing, it does everything. It is super quiet and I am having loads of fun with it.

This is the opposite corner of the room, looking over the top of my sewing machine.

This is the stacked-box shelves CJE made me for the corner beyond the ironing board. They are extremely user-friendly.

Everything about this room was made to order. I chose the bright yellow paint for the walls and the citrus-colored fabric for the ceiling. The orange strips on the walls are fabric-covered homasote board. This stuff is wonderful as I can pin things to them, projects in progress or decorative items.

This is my sanctuary, the place I go to when the world overwhelms me and I need some quiet and reflective time. Because I can't stand closed doors, the unwinding sign doesn't always mean much. Oftentimes Liam is in the room with me playing with toys scattered all over the floor, but still time spent in this room is time well-spent and I nearly always come out with a happier frame of mind.

Peace reigns within these walls.

Hooking up with:

"String too short to use"

10) B52s. We have unbelievably large flies that seem to be breeding in our garage. Every time I open the door between the house and garage I have to battle these enormous pests. I hate it when they actually manage to get in the house. CJE and I have taken to calling them B52s. Imagine an insect this big:

9) Liam and I spent an idyllic day in the backyard yesterday. I pushed him in the swing. We played pirate ship with him on his little slide. We watched a little green worm twist and squirm on the deck. We ate a ton of plastic food from his little plastic grill. We read several books and played music with his recorder (sure the neighbors loved that). We shot some hoops. We looked at the weeds, but opted not to pull them (too much like work). It was a lovely afternoon.

8) I am struggling mightily to keep up with birthday and anniversary cards this year. Every year about this time I loose momentum and all those born in the last half of the year get nothing. I promise myself each January: “This year will be different.” It never is. Wish me luck, cause . . . “This year will be different.”

7) A woman I met several years ago has become a very good friend of mine. She is someone I feel completely comfortable with and seems to love me despite my warts. She doesn’t seem to be shocked when I admit to her how difficult this whole mom thing is for me. Unfortunately she is moving overseas to teach for at least two years and I know when she returns stateside, she won’t be coming back to this little podunk town. I’m going to miss her terribly, but I seem to be fairly good at long-distance friendships. When she leaves, my closest BFF will be at least 200 miles away, and all others MUCH farther.

6) Ahhh (sigh of contentment). It is Sunday morning. There is coffee in my cup. My husband and four-year old are still in bed. The sun is shining. The birds are singing. What could possibly be better?

5) I have a new love. He has the most enchanting smile. His laugh is infectious. He is one of those rare guys who genuinely likes to cuddle. He isn’t afraid to cry. He says the funniest things. It doesn’t seem to matter to him that I am not built like a super model. I met him four years ago and he has been an amazing blessing in my life. Our love seems to grow with each passing year. His name is Liam. My husband knows all about him . . . and loves him, too.

4) Breakfast. My turn this morning as CJE made bacon, eggs and toast yesterday. Muffins this morning with fruit, I think.

3) Apparently my son’s dancing ability is more renowned than we realized. His Grandpa and Grandma in Illinois just sent him two left shoes!

2) Sundays and Thursdays have become my most looked-forward to days. I sew on Thursdays with anyone who cares to join me. Sometimes it is just Liam and I and sometimes friends come over to sew or cut or crochet or . . . whatever. It is always a pleasant day. Sundays I wave CJE and Liam off to church and I retreat to my sewing room, my sanctuary. I sew or sort fabric or iron or cut or whatever suits my fancy. In any case I usually get two to three hours all to myself. Precious, precious time.

1) If you could be more candid with one person you know from now on, who would it be?

Third of Five

I delivered my third of five this past Tuesday evening.

It so happened that in the course of this facebook pay-it-forward game one of my five ended up being Kevin, a guy I’ve known for about 18 years. Which is fine except . . . I work in fabrics! I racked my brain . . . what am I gonna make for a guy? Finally I came up with a concept and then spent some time in the fabric store with my mom and sister finding the right fabrics to complete my vision.

I finished an incredible wall hanging for him a few weeks ago. I called his wife on a Friday afternoon to find out if there was a time I could come by the house when Kevin wasn’t around so I could put it up and surprise him. Turns out he was having dialysis three nights a week so we scheduled for the following Monday evening.

On the Sunday of that weekend, she called me. We couldn’t come over on Monday because she and Kevin were headed for Portland. They had gotten a call and the kidney he had been waiting for was now waiting for him! Praise God! Kevin has diabetes and has been on a waiting list for a new kidney for some time.

The surgery was successful and everything looks good. Kevin is feeling better than he has in years. Talk is they are releasing him this Friday (today). Since I had decided the thing to do was to have it hanging in their home when he walks through the door, CJE and I talked their son into letting us in on Tuesday night to put it up. Now it is there, waiting for him whenever he gets home.

My readers get a little sneak peek. The hanging is about 40" square. It was great fun to make and I have adapted the “plaid looking” border for several other projects cause I just love it.

Joining up today with:

"String too short to use"

10) Never, never, never ask a woman if she is pregnant. Unless you can see a tiny hand, foot or head protruding from her body, it is best to just not ask. It is embarrassing for you and humiliating for her if she has to tell you “No.” Some of us are just rounder than others and you would do well to remember that the next time you are thinking about asking this potentially most embarrassing question.

9) Overnight it seems my son has outgrown every pair of shoes he owns. Unreal. Sunday morning as we were getting ready for church we discovered, with the exception of a pair of flips flops, we could get his feet into exactly one pair of shoes and as this was the pair with the smallest number on the bottom, we knew they didn’t really fit either. We had to just jam his feet into them and get through it. On the way home from church, he and I stopped at the shoe store. The sales clerk measured his feet. His largest pair of shoes was a 7, his foot measures an 8½. Oh, help.

8) For Mother’s Day I drug my husband into the Montavilla Sewing Center and showed him my dream sewing machine . . . and went home with one! It is a BabyLock Symphony and it is marvelous. It has all the wonderful features that cause a crafter like me to drool uncontrollably. Needless to say I have been spending every free moment sitting behind it dreaming and creating. Yea!

7) Work. Work has really been getting in the way of my play lately. I have to keep reminding myself that work is what pays for my play, but right now with the fine weather finally here and new ideas blossoming everywhere, it is a tough sell.

6) While I was at Quilt Camp earlier this month I discovered a new outlet for my creativity and passion. Suttle Lake Camp hosts Strength for the Journey at the camp in August. Strength for the Journey is a camp for men with HIV/AIDS. Each summer 50-75 men come to the camp for about four days to be nurtured and fed. They come for time to reflect, rest and gain strength in an atmosphere of peace and acceptance. Quilts are given to them as part of the activities of the camp. Quilts? Yes! I am hoping to get two done in time for the camp this summer.

5) Small boy turns four on Sunday. Yike! On top of his feet overnight no longer fitting in his shoes, big changes are in store over the next few months. He is so ready to go to school. Of course, he wants to ride the bus and I haven’t had the heart to tell him he won’t get to do that until Kindergarten. He’s going to be disappointed about it, but I still think he will love school.

4) When you put yourself out there and get shut down time after time, it becomes difficult to want to even bother. I have a small circle of friends who seem to understand me and for that I am extremely grateful. It has always been difficult for me to open up and make new friends and I am always so excited to find someone new who seems to like me . . . for whatever reason. I feel like I have a lot to give, but struggle with finding people who want what I have to share.

3) I have high hopes for my church family. We are getting a new pastor in July and someone collaborative would go a long way to helping us recover from the past eight years of minimalism.

2) My mom really wants Liam and I to come see her in July. CJE will be counseling at horse camp and there isn’t any reason Liam and I couldn’t go see Grandma. Except for the high cost of fuel. I haven’t figured out how I can afford to send CJE out of town one direction and Liam and I another. So how do I tell her we would love to see her, but just plain can’t afford the trip?

1) If you had to name the most incredible thing a friend has ever done for you, what would it be?

My friend Kathy Anderson gets this one. When I was about to be sent home from the hospital (45 miles away) after having Liam, but they were going to keep him, Kathy came and helped me situate things so I could stay in the Pediatric Ward with Liam and sent her pastor to visit with me as well. Asking for help is such a difficult thing. Swallowing my pride and admitting “I can’t” was the hardest thing I have ever done, and Kathy came through for me in a big way.

Peace located

I have found my peace. I have carved out a meager few hours of solitude in the craziness that is being the mother of my almost-4-year old, Liam. The only trouble is; it is Sunday mornings from 10:00 to noon or thereabouts while, you guessed it, CJE and Liam are at church.

Before Liam came along I was a faithful church-goer. After he came along my attendance became sporadic, and once he started to walk it became all but non-existent.

On one level I don’t have a problem with this. I am spiritually fed in other ways besides church every Sunday and the traditional Sunday sermon. The quiet solitude of my Sunday mornings has become sacrosanct and I absolutely don’t wish to give that up. It has become my time of introspection and meditation. Two things which are absolutely necessary for me to experience life on an even keel.

Another side of me is telling me there is immeasurable value in the fellowship of like-minded Christians and I am really missing out by not attending the service and gleaning said value with/from my church family. There is a peace and growth factor gained by being a part of a nurturing body of Christ, and I know this.

At this juncture I am very unsure which way to jump.

Liam will turn four two weeks from today. His normal MO is 90 miles an hour through the house; Mom, Mom, Mom-ing all the way. After a few days of this my brain seizes up and refuses to function properly and I feel a bit like the Goldie Hawn character in Overboard sitting on the corner of the couch staring into nothingness saying: “Buh-Buh-Buh-Buh.” The only therapy that seems to work for this condition is a quiet hour or three of solitude, a time when no one says my name and the only demands on my time are my own.

I struggle with the selfishness of it. I know my place is in a pew with my family, but if that is the choice I make; how do I keep from locking my son in a closet later in the week so I can have the peace my mind so desperately craves? How do I keep from becoming a screaming shrew by Thursday whom nobody wants to be around, let alone live with?

I really do feel I am doing this for my own sanity. Whether it is truly selfish or not is debatable. After all if Momma is happy, ain’t everybody happy?

Quilt Camp

I spent last weekend in the Cascade Mountains at Quilt Camp! It was delightful, insightful and refreshing.

It snowed. I think all 22 of us were hoping to get snowed in so we could just stay and play, but the three inches that fell was gone within a few hours.

We were warm and toasty inside the lodge with our machines, projects and fellowship.

I will write more about the art of it all later. I am still trying to internalize most of the thoughts and ideas which were flowing through the place. Suffice it to say we had a marvelous time and that’s why I return year after year.