Thursday, January 28, 2010

"String too short to use"

10) When you are the mom of a two-year old, a disposable diaper becomes part of the centerpiece on your diningroom table: out of the diaper bag onto the table, off of the table into the purse, out of the purse back onto the table, off of the table back into the diaper bag. Round and round it goes until it finally finds its way onto the bum of a small boy.

9) January is almost over. Yay! When you are a bookkeeper, not a CPA, January becomes a very busy month. W-2s and W-3s have to go out by the end of the month. 941s, 940s and Oregon quarterlies, accompanied by their payments, have to be mailed by month’s end. 1096s and 1099s have to be ordered, because the local office supply place is out, and then filled out and sent by the end of February. Plus, all my business want to have their stuff all completed for 2009 and to the CPA for income taxes. Just a few more days of this nuttiness. Whew!

8) “I been jugglin’, strugglin’, closin’ big deals, dancin’ backwards in high heels.” Much to my dismay, I can no longer even consider wearing high heels. Just thinking about them makes my feet hurt. Being diabetic makes the condition of my feet of paramount importance, and high heels have become out of the question. No more sexy shoes for me. Blech.

7) Finishing a project is one of the best feelings in the whole world. However, I have come to realize not everyone is like me and has several projects going at once. In fact, when we started our PIGS group, one of the gals confessed that she has NO unfinished projects. What?! How can that be? This prompted me, just out of curiosity, to count my unfinished projects. Now, this is actual projects started, but incomplete. Not just thought about or materials purchased for, but actually started, a seam is sewn, a stitch has been taken, paint has been applied or . . . I have 16. Do you think that might be too many?

6) I am working on believing I am capable of amazing, awesome and wondrous things. I don’t know what exactly, but I need to believe it. Everyone needs a little boost to their self-esteem on a regular basis. It is nice when it comes from other people, but sometimes you just have to reiterate it to yourself over and over again. Like a litany: “You can do it. You are awesome.”

5) I am deliberately taking Thursdays off nowadays. Thursdays have long been the worst day of my week. If I was having a bad day I could look at the calendar and . . . Yep, it’s Thursday. I figured, if I take Thursdays off, it makes me look forward to Thursdays and we do something fun and it is a great day. Yay! Mission accomplished.

4) Thank God for my family and friends. I have days, many of them, where I don’t feel like I’m really up to this whole motherhood thing. I love Liam to pieces, but I don’t feel like I’m a very good mother. I think God was crazy to trust me with this precious life. I’m so afraid I’m going to screw him up. My family and friends have graciously told me, sometimes over and over, that he is a sweet, happy and healthy little boy, so I must be doing something right. Lord, I hope they are right and I am wrong.

3) Mid-winter cleaning is progressing. We are slowly working our way through the house. Trying very hard to do major urban renewal without Ruth. She is no help and being RUTHLESS is the only way to find space in the closets and drawers around here. Ha!

2) Was absolutely ecstatic to hear from my dear friend Mags yesterday. She bought her dream car and I am so very thrilled for her. I know that feeling and it is a great one. I was also happy to find my method of vehicle purchasing works for others as well. I find big ticket items like cars to be impulse items. If Wal-Mart carried them, they would be right next to the checkstand, like a candy bar, so you could just grab one on your way out.

1) Trying hard to make it all work. One day at a time,


maggie said...

You can do it. You are awesome.

And btw ... it's even better than I thought. I can't wipe the goofy grin off my face, and frankly I can't wait to get out of work so I can drive again!

One final ps: You definitely will screw Liam up, in some way. All parents do. Just give him a good kind of crazy, and it'll be fine. You are an amazing mother; I hear it in your voice and I read it when you write. You love him, and he knows it. To me, that is the very definition of "good mother."

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